Saturday, January 20, 2018


Wow. My last post was in October.
So here comes my wrap up plus welcoming the new year post.

2017. wow.
I started to take diet seriously and I managed to slim down a lot, but consistency and perseverance are really crucial, I have been slacking so I am slowly gaining them back.

I travelled to Miri, Jogjakarta, Penang, Singapore and KL.

3 of my friends got married.

One of the very obvious changes I experienced is my previous housemates who came to this school together with me are both happily married now, and one even gave birth to a daughter in December. It's hard to believe in such a short span of time everything has changed.

Work was okay. I thank myself for making it through the year.

I fell out of love. Probably one of the most drastic decisions I have ever made. Nothing dramatic happened between us except I told him let's be friends. Too many things built up, my fault, his fault, and I got too tired one day.

Then I fell in love. The breakup almost drove me crazy, with all the guilt and pressure from so many parties. I fell sick, I haven't been that sick for long. But I am happy. I have never felt so in love before.

I let people down, my family, my friends. But why do I always have to live up to everyone's expectation. Why can't I just fuck up.

I learned not to tell everything. Life sucks. Work sucks. Does it mean that this year is gonna suck for me. FML bring it on.

有時你的自以為是帶來的殺傷力不是你可以想像的 我真的不愛說話了

Tuesday, October 24, 2017


Almost at the end of the academic year, workload is piling up, due to 

Whatever happened to all the I must be productive, I must be organized, I must be everything that I'm not now haha. 


Better luck next year, off to settle things I have yet to do T.T

Saturday, September 16, 2017

Anyone still reading?

Haha. So previously when I did the sayatme and sarahah thing, there were people asking me about this blog, it's quite nice to know someone still reads.

Then I started thinking, why would I run out of topics to blog about?
I do get it, my life is falling into a boring pattern, but there are so many little things in life worth recording, so why did I stop recording?

Then I think I found the answer, it must be because of Instagram story. Haha.

Sometimes I come across something really funny, and I thought I should blog about it. But at the same time I might have shared it on ig story, then after the story disappears 24 hours later, the thought of blogging disappears together with it, because 1. I've shared about it, I am lazy to do the same thing again, 2. I forgot what it was.

When I finally realized what was happening, I told myself I have to get back to this dusty space because it was something I really enjoyed doing, and I am not ready to let this blog die.


Monday, September 4, 2017


As Malaysians, we are blessed with a lot of holidays. 
I won't pretend that I do not feel happy when I get extra days off but I do agree with what people are talking about reducing productivity. 
I feel so reluctant to get back to school, to start everything all over again, to go through the same things over and over again, to see the same people and listen to them talk about the same things. 
Then I think of my students, I have to face them again! HELP!! 
they're probably feeling the same too, oh shit, have to face Cikgu Kho again. 
and I bet 120% they did not do the holiday work I myself or any other teacher of theirs assigned. 
I can already see myself getting mad in class tomorrow. 

anyway, how did I get here?

Oh, the holidays definitely slowed down the momentum, and I am as ready to face tomorrow as my students are ready to face SPM (which is NOT READY AT ALL). And also, knowing that holidays are coming up again, tell me how to gather myself together. T.T

I can do this. (while my heart and soul travels all around the world)

Tuesday, August 29, 2017

Quarter 3

Ohmy ohmy, August is about to end. And I haven't been updating. There are a few reasons, but mainly it is laziness, and I don't really know what to write anymore. I don't feel like typing a whole chunk of rants, I don't have any light topic to share, I am getting boring. 

more than two months since our trip to Jogjakarta.
I'm missing the carefree times and the crazy people.
Haha, it seems I am always saying the same thing.
Indeed, I am becoming boring.

So how's life? Okay-ish. Still alive and kicking (the ass of nobody) lol.
I've been working for a year and a half already (!!)
how did time pass me by?

what do I want to do with my life? I don't know.
what are my dreams? I don't know.
am I happy? I don't know.

err, so here's my sort of update. haha
let me rearrange my thoughts and my life, and I'll be back
not gonna let 2017 end with only 3 posts (omg)