Friday, February 26, 2016

I miss my orange hair

Whee! My TGIF after a long while. Actually not that whee, I'm quite bored. Came in at quite a strategic (or not) time, it's currently their sports week, lucky me was arranged to help with statistics instead of being under the hot sun. Next week and the week after next are the exam weeks, so naturally there won't be any teaching for us interims, and then here comes the midterm holiday!! 
I'm already counting down :D

The thing is that it is really boring here, the nearest town Bintangor is roughly 20minutes away by car, Sarikei and Sibu both around 40-45minutes! What's even more important is that we don't have a car. There's a very small TV with grainy resolution, and there's no wifi. I'm clinging on my remaining 1.4GB data for dear life until the renewal date lol. 

See I actually brought books here but I dare not start yet, maybe tomorrow. One for this week, one for next week, and then Kuching here I come again wheeee!

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

代課之餘寫了些字

這地方很大,卻很偏遠。走出住宿門外,看到的是頭頂那輪元宵節的明月,很亮很圓。偶爾還可以看到絢爛的煙火在不遠處的天空綻放。這裡天空很大,晚上沒什麼光害,看星星應該很不錯。天色還亮時,正對面就可以看到學校,建在草坡上,五顏六色的,草坡很大,青青的好美,應該滿instagrammable哈哈哈,當然我做了老師還是會一樣,其實沒什麼改變。學生們多是依班人,說的是馬來話,依班話,還有砂拉越當地語言,我不會,我真的覺得我慘了,我可以旁聽嗎?他們有依班語課耶。這種環境會造就怎麼樣的年輕人呢?我代了些課,有中五的學生對大學似乎很有憧憬,也有讀完中六的就在學校工作,回到自己的母校,安於行政辦公室裡的那個屬於她自己的角落,她說:不想讀太高,怕被派去教育部工作,得離開學校。她的英文不好,打華語很多錯別字,生活就是學校的那張桌子,空蕩蕩的住處,屏幕裡的電視劇還有每個週末都回的家。可是,可以常常回家真的好幸福。安於現狀是知足還是沒勇氣改變,我知道我是懶得面對改變。


剛剛又有了想法,真做老師了,我想當一個學生們會期待我進班的老師。
"Cz baby you're a firework, come on let your colours burst"


Monday, February 22, 2016

Checking in

I kinda have settled down, and I am feeling better. It's a new journey, but it is not a stranger. It's like going back to UM, and doing practical once again.

Accommodation wise: 
Which is what I worried the second most (after whether I get to go home during the March holiday lol). I am now staying in the teacher quarters opposite the school. I have two 3 other housemates, one sharing a room with me. That's where the going back to UM came from. Going back to KK8 more like, she isn't a Chinese, but she is an interim teacher like me, who also got very last minute notice. Difference is, she wants to be a teacher, lol. Rental is cheap, we have a kitchen, spent the whole afternoon cleaning up our new place. The room is finally habitable.

School:
The school is pretty big, with more than a hundred teachers, and they provide up to Form 6. The teachers are mostly friendly and helpful, the Chinese teachers are mostly foochow, the students are mostly Ibans. I guess that's where the real challenge lies. I sat in a class today, a girl asked for my guidance to complete her literature homework. I tried to explain to her, but my spoken BM is so bad, and they even communicate with some Bahasa Sarawak or Iban. How am I going to communicate properly with my students, what more to say teach them? 

What else, I went to the Sarikei town this afternoon in another interim teacher's car. It was roughly a 40minutes drive. That's how far I am from civilization lol. Yes we are that isolated. 

New challenge. Go Melody go!
I'll update again when I have more things to say. 

But overall, I am feeling a lot better. Missing home though, happy chap goh meh. 

Saturday, February 20, 2016

in my face

just moments after I published my previous post, my world changed
I had actually received this SMS earlier on, I just didn't want to believe that it was happening.
they always say that seniors waited for at least a year, and I didn't even go for any interview
and what's more importanter (lol) is that I am very much against being a teacher T.T
I keep waiting for other job offers: conceptual writer, content writer, communication writer etc.
who would have guessed that this would come first T.T

so I am going to SMK Meradong, as an interim teacher.
Don't ask me what an Interim teacher is, I wish I knew.
I don't know what lies ahead.
all I know is that this place is a 7 hours drive from Kuching.
and that I am already looking forward to school holidays.
reporting to school on Monday, gonna move my reluctant ass to a whole new place.

I don't know what to feel anymore. I don't know why I feel like crying.
I should be feeling lucky.

Wednesday, February 17, 2016

I miss my frog.

One week has passed since my last post. Just yesterday, we sent pet frog back to Taiwan again.
This morning, I woke up to her empty mattress beside me, feeling as empty as that mattress.
The next time we get to meet would be the next CNY, is that not torturous? *sighs*

Okay I don't really know what to feel, emotions just kicked in. 

I still don't know what my future is gonna be like.
It's okay, they say. Enjoy first, they say.
But they also say, you can try this, you can try that.
GAHHHHHH.

Where do I wanna be, what do I wanna be.
Where do I see myself in 5 years.
I don't know. Probably still sitting in front of this same laptop (hopefully it is still alive), fretting about the next 5 years to come. LOL. I was just kidding. I'd die of boredom, and self-hate. Please remind me if I forget, thank you. Anyway, don't you get annoyed by people who cannot differentiate boring and bored. I'm boring. Yea, you are pretty boring. So boring that you bore me. *roll eyes* I am not arrogant or whatever, I just can't stand that.

see, I always sidetrack.

Some people are so clear of what they want, they work hard, they get into all the right courses, they do all the right things, and they end up where they want to be. Can't believe after 8 months of finishing my degree I am still standing here. Heh. How interesting.

Wednesday, February 10, 2016

Gongxi gongxi gongxi

Happy Chinese New Year you guys!
A distant relative is here visiting, I dread socializing with them (don't judge me, lol). Suddenly came an annoying fly, I seized the chance and volunteered becoming the fly catcher. While I was waltzing around with the racket, looking for signs of the fly, I suddenly had a sense of deja vu. Ahh, I did it during one of the Quidditch matches back at school! 

...

One can always imagine right. Hahaha
Hi I'm the latest Hufflepuff seeker. :D